🌿 The Critic Isn’t the Enemy

That Familiar Inner Voice

The other day I noticed my own inner critic creeping in. I was working on something that took a lot longer than expected. I had to leave it unfinished, I got a bit frustrated, and almost immediately a voice whispered: “You should have been able to finish--you don't really know what you're doing!!” This came with a sinking feeling in my belly and a certain heaviness.

I’ve seen this same pattern in so many women I work with — even after decades of caring for others, achieving, or simply holding life together, the critic still pipes up as if it’s never satisfied.

Bringing Curiosity

It can feel like this voice is out to sabotage us, but here’s what I’ve learned: the inner critic isn’t trying to ruin our lives. It’s trying to protect us.

Harsh words like “don’t get too confident” or “you’ll embarrass yourself” are often just fear in disguise — fear of rejection, failure, or judgment. The critic believes that if it keeps us small, we’ll stay safe.

✨ We can start to shift this when we stop fighting the critic and begin listening with curiosity.

A simple question

Next time the critic shows up, pause for a moment and ask:
“What are you worried will happen if you didn’t warn me like this?”

You may not get a clear answer at first — and that’s completely okay. The important thing is the shift: instead of fighting with the critic, you’re turning toward it with curiosity.

Even that small change in approach can begin to bring more peace inside. It shows this part of you that you’re willing to listen, and that simple willingness often creates just a little more space, a little more ease.

Remember, you don’t need to silence or get rid of this voice. The goal is to bring more understanding to it — and in doing so, give your Inner Guide more room to speak.

I’ll be back next month with another reflection. Until then, may you meet your critic with just a little more curiosity.

With warmth,
Suzanne

P.S. I’d love to hear if you try this practice — just hit reply and let me know how you went with this different approach.